May the Lord Guide Us to Vaping

My name is Dr. Austin Downs and I thank Jesus Christ every day for giving me vaping. I used to smoke 2 packs a day and I was really fat and ugly. My teeth were gross, my body repulsive, women wouldn’t even touch my hair. Then one day, when I was at the track betting on Elijah in the third race, my buddy Lucious pulled out a Vamo. I burned my last grit and asked him if I could try some. My lord, it was heavenly! It tasted like brown sugar cinnamon laced with honey in a cookie jar! I just couldn’t believe it. I raced home in my corvette, nearly flipping her a few times, and looked up the nearest vape shop. I bought an ego pen and started vaping right then and there. Now I get on my hands and knees and thank our true lord jesus christ for giving America vaping. I can do work in the lawn again, screw in lightbulbs, and even out run my daughter’s boy friend in an old fashioned foot race. Thank you Jesus. Thank you!